Monday, September 29, 2008

Why Barack Obama is a Jedi




Tonight was our weekly "Movie Night". Once a week I take the kids to blockbuster, the boys take turns choosing the movie, we order pizza and spend a couple hours together. Tonight it was Jude's turn, and he selected "The Return of the Jedi". This is one of my favorite movies for a lot of reasons, the main one being that Harrison Ford is my favorite actor and he is still smokin' hot in this movie. But that's besides the point.

So we are near the end of the movie, where the rebels are trying to get in to the little outpost to destroy in and bring down the Death Star's energy field(Disclaimer: I promise I am not a nerd, please hear this out) Luke has gone and turned himself in and is now sitting in front of the Emperor being taunted about the fact that his friends are basically walking in to a trap and cannot succeed against the enormous enemy force that will be there to greet them.

At this point my sister in law, Mary, makes a comment that this sort of reminds her of the current Presidential campaign. The large, controlling, evil empire in the hands of a few individuals desperately clinging to power for power's sake at the expense of everyone around them versus the small, seemingly insignificant rebel alliance, facing long odds but willing to take a chance knowing that they are the last hope for freedom and justice in the galaxy.

"Plus," I say, "The Emperor does kinda look like John McCain."

This makes my nine year old laugh hysterically.

So naturally Luke Skywalker becomes Barack Obama. Young, determined, energetic, charismatic (insert any good adjectives here) and possessed with internal strength, natural ability, and desire to do good. All necessary things when one is going about the business of saving the universe. Or in our case, just the United States of America. In this last big scene Skywalker says repeatedly that he does not want to fight, that he believes there is good in everyone, that he will not turn to the dark side. He is not there to destroy anyone, he only wants to bring them along with him in to a better, brighter, more peaceful future. Obama wants to discuss the real issues, not Palin's pregnant daughter. He wants fairness and equality, and a government governed by people who care about those less fortunate then themselves. He wants to promote science, education, advancement and alternatives instead of "same old same old, and who cares if it kills the planet because we will all be dead by then anyways!" policies. He's fighting this fight because he has to, not because he wants to. Which makes him a Jedi in my book. (Ok, now I am a nerd)

Joe Biden then can be our ever favorite Han Solo. Older, with a bit of a chip on his shoulder and street smarts to boot. He's charming and brave with a tendency to put his foot in his mouth. But we love him anyways. Biden, that is. Well, and Han Solo but everyone loves Han Solo so that goes without saying.

Sarah Palin won the dubious distinction of becoming Darth Vader. No, not because I think she is evil. Which she is. (Warning to my Conservative friends: Stop Reading Now. Wait....do I even HAVE conservative friends?) She is Darth Vader for the one simple fact that Vader is the Emperor's ultimate undoing. The difference of course here is that Vader makes a conscious choice to toss the Emperor over the railing in to the blue-fiery-pit-of-death-thing, while Palin on the other hand I think will rather accidentally and slowly nudge McCain over that precipitous ledge with her incoherent speeches. In fact the upcoming VP debate could actually be the defining ledge-tumbling moment.

As seemingly minor characters in this drama we also nominated the Religious Right to be the Storm Troopers. Unable to think outside the box, they can't stray from the pack, but they can blindly follow orders quite well. They are a well organized, well trained force that strikes fear in to the heart of many and then uses that fear to control them. To counter this of course there is a positive force: The Ewoks. Small, furry, feisty, smart. At first glance they certainly don't appear to be any real threat. But they were the one variable the bad guys hadn't seen coming and they tipped the scales allowing the rebels to proceed to victory. We don't have Ewoks in our fine country, but we do have college students. Lots and lots of them. And in this monumental, historical election, in this defining make-or-break moment, they will stand up and demand change. Or at the very least they might hit someone in the head with a sling-shot rock. You know, whatever they gotta do to get their point across. That point is this: Its time for a new generation to be in control. Because I personally do not believe our country can survive 4 more years of this shit.